chapter one

well i'll start us off, i have several thoughts...

1)i never thought of being a help meet as my "purpose for being created" [pg 21]. the sunday school answer to "why were we [mankind] created?" was always some variation of "to worship him." looking at these verses on creation and women lends a new light to that though. as women we were created not simply to worship god but to complete (help) the created man. especially as a newer wife (one year anniversary in a few days) i still am adjusting to thinking of myself not alone in spiritual terms. for so long it was "wait, be patient, concentrate on being godly yourself" and not coveting the role of wife/mother that i always wanted. and yet, it seems so natural to take on the roles of "woman" in my marriage. part of my purpose now truly is to help my husband. i like thinking of it as on pg 22 - to honor and serve your husband is to honor and and serve god.

2)"a unisex society is a senseless society" [pg 21]. amen! while i have advance pretty far in the career world i have always said i love my field for the fact that no one expects me to be a man! but even still when working outside the home there is a level of control that i know is not mine to weld at home. i spend my whole time at work giving orders (to techs, to nurses, to patients). i've done that for 10 years now...and only a year ago did i have to start stepping back outside of work and let someone else have the role of leader. it hasn't always been easy...i like her example on pg 23 of herself going through the office. i can relate to that bc i've never thought of myself as better than those i manage/direct at work. in the same way a husband is no better than a wife. but only one person can be in charge...and it is not the wife!

3)"if god created a special woman, perfectly suited to be your husband's helper, would you be that woman?" [pg 21] my husband frequently laughs and tells me he knows i'm not perfect but that i'm perfect for him...if u asked him this question he would say absolutely i would be that woman. however, when u ask ME, i see all kinds of shortcomings i wish i could do better, or be better FOR him. and while i say the same thing to him...(for indeed he is NOT perfect) he is soooo good to me that it inspires me to be good to him...but i am so flawed. anyone else struggle w/ this? i know my self worth and don't really have self esteem issues...it is just the same sense of falling short of the mark set before me that i get when i reflect on my measurement of what god would have me do in all other areas of life...

4)"a perfect help meet is one who does not require a list of chores..." [pg 23] that is surely high standards. it is so much easier to me to go down the checklist of what i need to do/should do than to seek out things that i think he would want done. it is sometimes tough to see bc so much of everything he wants done he just up and does himself. maybe as time goes on i will be able to predict these things better but for now...we both had been so independent for so long that we are used to doing for ourselves. and many things he is a tad OCD about...ie: i did the dishes the other night (he usually does...and this is why) thinking i was helping him bc he seemed tired. a couple days later he said to me "hey, thanks for doing the dishes the other night...i noticed" so i said "ur welcome...why did u notice" and he said "well u kinda cheated, bc they were in the dishwasher. so i took them out and just washed them by hand." at which point all i could say was "so, not a big help then if ur still going to take them out and do them. next time i'll just have to wash them by hand" and he said "no, don't do that...i still have to rewash them...i don't think u use hot enough water" LOL and this is why HE does the dishes....did i mention he is a clean freak? he says he enjoys it tho...guess that falls under his discretion of what he would like to delegate to me. i hope to someday be deemed able to both wash dishes well enough and fold his clothes correctly (again...he redoes them if i do his folding)

anyhow those are my thoughts on chapter one...